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Question: Assalamualikum..my weakness is I am unable to control my anger n nafs...when I was in anger I used harsh wrdss I tried a lot to control my anger but itw nt working what to do control anger...I am unable to control my nafs how to control nafs to protect from major sins like zina n mastubutation pls give me answer so that I protect from sins
Answer:

I empathize with your situation and pray to Allah to help you overcome this condition.

Anger can lead to self-destruction - if a person cannot control it. Therefore, I would urge you to take this issue seriously and take immediate steps to treat this condition. I am inclined to think you need the help of a professional counselor to get a handle on it. So, please speak to your family physician and let him refer you to a specialist who can teach you how to manage anger. I am sure it would help you. So do not hesitate in doing so as soon as possible.

 Having said this, let me suggest some Islamic tips and Du'as that you can use on a regular basis to seek help from Allah.

In order to control your anger, you must do two things:

First, you should ask yourself why, when, and how you are getting angry and control the circumstances that create such situations. By directing your thoughts in this way, you can often control your anger.

So condition yourself to ask questions such as the following: Why am I getting angry? What is the big deal about reacting to something that happened in the past? Can I change it now?

If the milk is already spilled, how is my anger going to help to bring it back? What benefit can I gain by reacting in anger? Is there anything far more beneficial I can do instead?

Furthermore, think of all the harmful effects of anger if it is not controlled. In fact, there is nothing more destructive than anger if it leads to violence or inflicting verbal or emotional abuse on people.

So condition yourself to think of the destructive consequences of anger until you learn to associate anger with pain, ugliness and suffering. In this way, you will be better able to take control of your anger and make sure that it is not expressed in a harmful way.

Second, as soon you find yourself becoming angry, channel your energy in positive ways by immediately taking the following steps:

Say:

A`oodhu billahi mina ash-shaytaani ar-rajeem.

(I seek refuge in Allah from Satan the accursed) three times, and walk immediately to the washroom and perform ablutions with cool water and pray two rak`ahs.

Alternately, you can repeat the above words, and go for a walk or take some deep breaths and do some minor exercises to release the tension and relax.

Finally, here are a few du`a’s you should recite and meditate upon consistently:

Allaahumma innee a`oodhu bika min hamazaati ash-shayaateen; wa a`oodhu bika rabbi an yahdhuroonee.

(O Allah, I seek refuge in You from the whisperings of devils; and I seek refuge in You from their presence around me). 

Astaghfiru Allah (I ask Allah for forgiveness) three times.

Rabbi qinee sharra nafsee; rabbi qinee sharra sam`ee; rabbi qinee sharra basaree; rabbi qinee sharaa lisaanee.

(My Lord, save me from the evils of my own self; my Lord, save me from the evils of my hearing; my Lord, save me from the evils of my seeing; my Lord, save me from the evils of my tongue.)

You can also simply make the following tasbeeh:

Subhaan Allah, al-hamdu lillah, laa ilaha illa Allah, wa laa hawla wa laa quwwata illa bi-llah.

(Sublime is Allah; praise be to Allah; there is no god but Allah; there is no power or strength except by the will of Allah).

 

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