You are committing a grave sin by using the laws of Allah as a means of intimidation or threats against your wife. It is akin to jesting with the sacred laws. You are advised to repent to Allah and ask His forgiveness.

You also need to expiate for the oath you have made by feeding ten poor persons; if you cannot afford to do so, you need to fast three days. Allah says: "Allah will not take you to task for oaths which you may have uttered without thought, but He will take you to task for oaths which you have sworn in earnest. Thus, the breaking of an oath must be atoned for by feeding ten needy persons with more or less the same food as you are wont to give to your own families, or by clothing them, or by freeing a human being from bondage; and he who has not the wherewithal shall fast for three days [instead]. This shall be the atonement for your oaths whenever you have sworn [and broken them]. But be mindful of your oaths!' Thus Allah makes clear unto you His messages, so that you might have cause to be grateful." (Qur'an: 5:89).

In conclusion, you ought to expiate for the oath you have made by feeding ten poor persons or fasting three days. Your marriage is not affected by the words you have uttered. However, you must never repeat the same offence.

It is even more important for you to seek marriage counseling so that you learn how to control your anger and how to strengthen your marriage.